Thursday, January 18, 2007

Part time job - part two

So, it's part two because this morning I continue my work again and I thought yesterday was the first day and suppose to be my last day. But, who knows, shit happens again to me; it has been extended until this afternoon. So, early in the morning, have to start drilling again. This time I'm not so lucky. I injured my left hand due to that drill is too heavy. Sigh, I have no idea how am I going to serve this saturday. But somehow, it's done. I'm done for the day.

So, I was packing up my stuff and on my way to my car. And guess what, my car is almost cover all up with red ants on top of my car. I was wondering, why there's so many cars packed along side with me, but why only my car is full of red ants? Only one answer explain it all, Shit Happens.. Hmm, I start pondering whether or not it's a curse to me since after I put that symbol 'Shit Happens' in my car. Anyway, let's forget about it. So, my hand gets 'dirty' today. I killed lots of lots of ants.

Hopefully there's nothing to do with that symbol.. Hahaha.. It was gift from my beloved friend all the way from australia. If she read this, I think she's gonna be mad.. Sorry ya.. ;P i don't mean it..

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Part time job?

Hmm, it's been a long while I didn't work outside. So yesterday one of my mom's friends gave me a call while I was still sleeping on my lovely bed. So he asked me whether I wanted to work for one day as a so called IT technician 'lar'. So since I've got nothing to do, I accepted that offer. On the other side I also can earn a little income for myself. So, today is the day. I woke up and wait for his call. Why? Because he didn't tell me anything about the work. Where to meet? Where to work? What time to meet? And what do to? He didn't tell me anything regard of this. So I waited for his call, and he called me again while I was still sleeping on my lovely bed again. He told me where to meet and what time then he hang up his phone. He didn't told me what car is he driving also.

So I just went there and hopefully I can recognize his face. So coincident when I arrived that place, an estima started to reverse and went pass by me. I can't really see clearly his face at that moment, I just knew that he's fat, and my mom's friend is fat. So I just followed that car. But, inside my heart telling me, "this isn't right man!" So I called my boss and asked him whether he's there already or not? Who knows he said haven't yet and the best part is, I waited him at the wrong place some more. Shit happens sometimes...

So, this shit haven't finished happening yet. As I mentioned above, I was called to be as an IT technician. So the task for the day is to set up those network cables for an office. And due to I've no experience on this, and guess what did I do for the day? Grill the wall man!! What the heck! My hand shakes non stop. Oh boy, I don't know how am I going to play guitar this week. My hand is as weak as a toufu now. Habislah. God, have mercy on me!

ps: haha, so it's drill not grill ya.. Too hungry at that moment, so thinking of grill something to eat.. hahaha..

satan's pride and my pride

I think now only I really understood why satan desired to be God so much. When there's something that you never had before and suddenly you have it, you will tend to use it if it's not for the correct purpose then you'll used it for the wrong purpose. When you have everything that you wanted and when everything seems to be pretty good, you'll tend to become forgetful that who is the one that actually provided all these things to you. Satan has this problem. He (an angel actually doesn't have any gender, so I refer him as a male) was an archangel that is in charge of worship in heaven. He's good looking, talented musician, gifted in music and leading worship, and he's basically good at everything. And all this, it's God who created him and given him so many talents, and yet, he rebelled against God because he thinks that "Since I had everything that I wanted and I have so many talents and power, why not I become God myself? So this is the problem about him. And this is the main reason why satan fall. When satan fall unto the earth, he uses the same trick again to make a trap for Adam and Eve. I believe everyone is familiar with this story. The serpent(satan) tempted Eve to eat that forbidden fruit by using the same old trick again which is pride. He said, "when you eat of it (the fruit) your eyes will be opened and YOU WILL BE LIKE GOD, knowing good and evil."

It's pretty much scary when you realized that you're getting there soon. Pride happens when the glory that suppose belong to God, instead of giving all the glory back to God, you keep it for yourself. This is what I personally found out just recently. How do I realized that? Because I'm the one that involved in it.

As for those people who knew me, they knew that I'm a new electric guitar player in my church. I started to picked up and learn electric guitar about half a year ago. I've improved a lot and most of the people said that I'm a fast learner and I did a pretty good job too. Well, I really thank God for what He had blessed me a talent of playing guitar, but there's where my pride comes in. Because of that, I came to realized that I started to keep little by little glory for myself instead of giving it all to God. Well, I admit that I'm still weak in this area and when I came to realized this, I felt down on my knees and pray for forgiveness. The main reason why satan fall is because of pride. I don't wish my pride causes me to stumble and fall.

At the beginning, I don't have anything and suddenly I had these skills. Firstly, I used it for correct purpose, I used it to serve God back in that area. I appreciate this gifts and I practice even harder to make myself improve more. But the problem with me is, after quite some time, my skills really improved, but I forget actually it was God that given me this talent. And I thought it's was 'I' that help myself to improve.

Recently God reminded me again what is the very first motive why I served Him? Why do I came every week to practice on Tuesday? Why do I attended service every Saturday/Sunday? It doesn't seems related to my problem, but then God reminded me about 'LOVE'. It's out of love that initiates me to served Him at very beginning. Paul said "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing." - 2 Corinthians 13:1-3

God reminded me again that serving Him doesn't have to be very knowledgable, doesn't have to be very experiences in certain areas, very well equipped in certain skills, all ever God wanted is a heart that willingly follow Him faithfully and a heart that love Him more than anything else. I'll learn this lesson and hopefully one day when I accomplish those lessons, I'll heard God saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said to Him humbly, "Here I am Lord. Send me!"